Two Thumbs
by fireflyjunction
Summary: Just what everyone has been waiting for! Or not! The hidden truth about what Erik really thinks of the new movie! Please Review! And use exclamation points!
1. Default Chapter

_**Update: **Boy, you can never win, can you? Grins Do to mass confusion as to whom was speaking; I have added details to help keep things clear. I'm really sorry about that. I'm currently fixing the next chapter as well so it may take a bit longer to update…_

_**Author's Note:** First of all, my sincere apologies go out to anyone who is waiting for an update on my other stories. Now that this monster is almost finished, I should be able to get updates posted soon!  
Secondly, this story is for Vincent (that's two for you man, now stop requesting these things so I can work on MY stuff!). What can I say; I'm a sucker for requests?  
And lastly, a few notes about the story itself. The whole idea is that Mandy (The phan from You Called? – although you don't have to have read that story to understand this one, but feel free to do so) is forcing poor Erik to watch the new movie and basically there isn't a whole lot of action going on. It's kind of like Mystery Science Theater where they talk through most of the movie but hopefully you can still follow along with them. Anyway, this is getting long enough, on with the story!_

_**Disclaimer**: I own Mandy and… that's about it._

"Look Erik," Mandy announced as she ripped the plastic packaging off the DVD box. "I agreed not to drag you off to the theater to see the film on the condition that you watch it with me when it came out on video. I now own the movie and you now are going to watch it."

"But why do we have to watch it now?" He complained even as he sat down on the sofa.

"Because there are poor, starving children in Africa who will never get a chance to see this movie and you should be ashamed of yourself if you don't watch it. Think of how grateful they'd be for an opportunity like this, and you're whining about it like an ungrateful, spoiled and selfish brat." Was the reply as the disk inside came free and went into the machine.

"You are evil."

"Yep, have some popcorn." Handing him the bowl, Mandy fidgeted until the FBI warning on screen went away and was replaced with the menu.

"Shouldn't we save it for those starving children you seem so fond of?" He asked, looking down at the bowl sitting in his lap.

"By the time it gets there it will be stale now be quiet and watch the movie." Grabbing a handful she pointedly ignored him as he raised his mask to munch a few kernels.

"A candle? The great opening number of my movie has been replaced by a candle?" He asked over his mouthful.

"Hold on, it just getting started. Your drug-induced overture is coming up."

"Good, it would have been very bad if someone had decided to cut it from the movie…"

"Ah yes, its so comforting to know that despite the sudden fame and fortune that has been thrust upon you, you are still the insane psychopathic murderer we all know and love."

"I do my very best to keep my loyal fans happy." He replied, looking very smug.

"And I'm sure they all appreciate all the effort you put into it." Mandy replied rolling her eyes, and grabbing more popcorn.

"Why is it in black and white? Did the super expensive chandeliers use up all the budget?"

"It's like the Wizard of Oz, it will colorize eventually." He gave her a weird look and she made a mental note to bring home the munchkin movie one of these days.

"Who is that decrepit cripple supposed to be?" He asked, returning his attention to the movie and the popcorn.

"That's Raoul."

"That's the Fop! That's the pretty boy bachelor, beloved of the city!"

"Umm, yeah." Silently she pondered when he became the beloved of anyone else besides Christine much less an entire city.

"Christine has got to see this! She'll change her mind faster than you can say Phantom!" He announced, full of glee.

"Right and that's Madam Giry."

"He's that old and she's still alive? How is that even possible?"

"It's a movie." The sad truth indeed.

"So how old am I?" he asked suspiciously.

"A question that has plagued endless fans across the years." She hedged, reaching for more popcorn.

"Ah yes, Hannibal, that brings back memories…Not sure why anyone would spend that much for such a junky old poster though."

"It is kind of pretty…" At his sneer she faltered.

"An artistic rendition of Carlotta could never be considered pretty." He snarled dramatically.

"You do have a point." She conceded, determined to not fight during the movie it had taken so much effort and bribery to get him to watch.

"Fifteen francs for three human skulls! Good lord, I've been sitting on a gold mine all this time and I didn't even know it!"

"That's so wrong!" she shouted, nearly choking.

"I didn't kill them, they're victims of the commune! We'll at least they were, though according to the date at the beginning that hasn't happened yet so I have no idea how they got there." He looked thoughtful for a moment, apparently pondering how they did get there.

"Still gross!" She muttered, grabbing for her drink.

"This from Mandy, the girl who thought that the Robert Englund version was cool." He too reached for the glass beside him.

"Hey! It has some great moments of cinematic brilliance such as the beautiful graveyard scene and besides, having an intense Phantom was a nice change." Passing him a straw she sipped at her own drink.

"Having the Fop die was a nice change…" he smiled happily and Mandy grinned back.

"Be quiet, they're auctioning off your monkey toy."

"That just sounded wrong." He frowned, arching his eyebrow at the innuendo.

"That's because you have a warped mind."

"Agreed. Who would have thought, a bidding war over my music box! How dare that miserable little Fop even consider buying it! And what exactly is Madam Giry going to do with it?"

"That's not the point." She sighed and set her drink back down. No fighting.

"Thirty francs! That is a priceless, antique, collectable, limited edition, handcrafted…"

"…monkey now owned by your arch nemesis." Ok, well maybe a little friendly teasing wouldn't hurt…

"Where is he, I'll kill him! I _guarantee_ it will still play when he's dead!" Erik snarled, throwing back the Fop's words in fury.

"Shhh! Here's the best part!" Hmm, then again, maybe not.

"The best part of the movie is at the beginning? Doesn't say a lot for the rest of the movie then does it?" He snorted, leaning back on the cushions.

"I _will_ smack you…" She warned, as Erik merely rolled his eyes.

"I love this movie." Was his sarcastic reply.

"I mean it…" She threatened again, and he grinned before returning to the movie as the chandelier burst into life.

"Wow, they really improved the orchestrations of the overture didn't they? Its amazing how much more depth of sound…" He began, trying to cool down the girl who was still scowling at him.

"What is wrong with you? Look at how cool that is! Wouldn't it be awesome if we could clean up your lair that easily?" In an instant her anger was forgotten.

"Or your apartment…" He smirked at the thought.

"Hey, its not that bad…" she began, looking around quickly.

"Grrr, the Fop's back! I hate this movie!"

"They try so hard to make him look cool, driving his carriage around all manly and all but we all know what a wus he really is." She frowned in distaste as the image on screen continued to show _that_.

"It is interesting to see their interpretation of what was going on behind the scenes." He said as the scene progressed.

"I guess you could look at it like that, or you could point out that they probably just spent at least a million or so on visual junk that is entirely pointless and does nothing to further the plot."

"I was merely trying to be polite. I was under the assumption that you adored this movie." Setting down his drink at last, he resumed munching popcorn.

"Lets just say I love it in spite of its glaringly obvious and numerous flaws."

"Ah, here is Christine!" His entire face lit up with happiness at the sight of her.

"And her little Meg too! Hee hee hee! Sorry, Wizard of Oz crept back in on me" She apologized lamely as he gave her another odd look.

"People like you should come with warning labels."

"Nah, nobody reads instructions or owner's manuals so why would they read warning labels? Besides, you didn't come with one." Brushing aside his comment with ease, she grabbed a chocolate bar and began fighting with the wrapper.

"Yes, but Leroux wrote one for me." He watched as she struggled in vain.

"Well, maybe someday someone somewhere will write one for me and then one day I too can have my own endless spin-offs in theater and movies! Maybe even a Prime Time sitcom!" She growled as the chocolate inside continued to elude her.

"I don't have a Prime Time sitcom." He smirked as he watched her attempt to use her teeth to open it.

"Its not for want of trying I'll bet." She retorted through the plastic in her mouth. Reaching over he gently took it from her mouth and effortlessly opened the package and took a piece of candy.

"Oh no! Please say no! Anything but Carlotta singing!" He suddenly howled as a horrendous screeching filled the room.

"Oh, did I forget to turn the surround sound on? You can't get the true experience without the full sound surrounding you…" Mandy grinned evilly as she reached over and reclaimed her candy bar.

"You are truly evil." He hissed.

"You've said that already." She replied, looking exceedingly smug.

"Doesn't make it any less true." He snarled, knowing he was being mocked.

"You seemed to have missed a bit while you were talking, do you want me to rewind it for you?" Continuing to tease him, she laughed when he visibly cringed.

"Hold on a second!" He interrupted. "What's up with the little guy? I don't remember any little guy…" he let the sentence drag, hoping she wouldn't start cracking more jokes at his expense.

"Carlotta got doggies so I guess Piangi needed some loving too…Eww!" She made a face of absolute disgust and he couldn't help but frown as well.

"I agree."

"At least they left in the elephant thing, though it doesn't really provide the comedic relief that it did in the musical." She commented as the giant thing lumbered onto the stage.

"This is the musical." He pointedly reminded her.

"Oh come on, you know what I mean! In the non-movie version of the musical!"

"Which non-movie musical are you referring to?" He persisted with his obnoxious game.

"I don't care how annoying you try to be, you are still going to watch this movie!"

"Who said I was trying?" he whispered mischievously.

"This is the reason that Nadir didn't want to be in the show isn't it? You would have driven him crazy backstage!" She accused, refusing to rise to his bait.

"I drive him crazy everywhere. He deserves it for leading that pipsqueak down to my house!"

"Be quite or you're going to miss everything! See the managers are talking!" Mandy gestured to the screen even as Erik snorted in derision.

"I've already suffered through countless incarnations of this story not to mention having actually lived it, somehow I think I'll be able to keep track of what's going on." He muttered sarcastically.

"Yeah but this is the first glance of your character. Don't you want to see it?"

"Seeing as how you refuse to let me leave, I am apparently going to see it regardless of my lack of desire to do so." She frowned at him and he handed her the now empty popcorn bowl.

"You sure know how to make a girl feel loved." She mumbled as she went to pop more. Fortunately for once a small apartment wasn't so bad as she could still see the movie from the kitchen.

"You must have very low standards." He shouted over the sound of the microwave.

"And there you are in your dark and mysterious cape, lurking about in the shadows!" she sighed happily, coming to stand behind him.

"You make it sound almost fun." He replied dryly.

"It is fun!"

"So it was you who took my cloak!" In a flash he had whirled and turned to her, eyes blazing.

"Uhhh…here's Christine's big moment." She pointed, attempting to distract him.

"I want it back, right now!" He demanded, in no way sidetracked.

"I'm holding it ransom till you see all of the movie." She announced as he continued to glare up at her.

"Fine, but your paying to have it cleaned!" He replied turning to the movie.

"Hey!"

"So you want argue?" He asked turning once more, his golden eyes blazing.

"No."

"Good." He resumed his previous position on the couch.

"Meany." She whispered, sticking her tongue out at him.

"What was that?" he asked.

"And here we have presto-changeo number two!" Grabbing the new bowl of popcorn she returned to the sofa.

"Yes. I must say the horses are a nice touch, too bad all they do is stand there."

"Well Christine doesn't exactly sweep across the stage so I guess it works." She mumbled around a mouthful of popcorn.

"She does seem rather still for a dancer, but she's probably just nervous."

"Or unable to move due to the weight of her skirt, same difference." At her reply Erik snorted good-naturedly.

"She's a very good singer though she does need a trifle more practice." He brushed the comment aside and reached for more popcorn.

"Her ability is a highly debated topic and I suggest that if you want to survive, do not comment on her singing ever again." Mandy announced matter-of-factly.

"Having some problems with the Rabid Phans I take it?" he smirked at the thought.

"You have no idea…"

"Is he standing in a sewer?" he shouted in shock at the screen. "Erik would never stand in a sewer! Kill the fop and take his seat! Or just kill the fop!"

"Note to Christine, feel free to move at any time now…or acquire a new facial expression, anything at all…" She decided not to mention the random third person reference for now.

"You know I had a dream once where I was reading a newspaper whose headline was 'Chandelier Drops On Singing Fops'." He commented as the fop in question reappeared.

"Right, well at least it wasn't another nightmare, though I don't see how it could fall on him since he sits in a private box." She mumbled as the film continued.

"I would be more than happy to give you a demonstration." His eyes glittered in the dark and his smile showed too many teeth.

"Do I have to provide my own Fop?" She asked wickedly.

"It shouldn't prove too difficult to borrow that one." He nodded towards the screen.

"Erik, borrowing implies that it will be returned."

"Shh, she's singing." He dismissed her objections causally as he became entranced by the movie once more.

"No she's attempting to sing, there is a subtle difference."

"Be quite!" He hissed as the notes died away.

"The big finish is over, why do I have to be quite?"

"I just thought it might work on keeping you silent for more than two seconds." He smugly grinned down at her and reached for more popcorn.

"Ha ha, very funny."

"Yes, I thought so. Too bad it didn't work."

"Is it my fault that I have a few more working brain cells than Christine?" She asked defensively as he continued to devour the popcorn at an alarming rate.

"Yes it is, but it can be fixed." He teased over a mouthful.

"Angel of Music and Brain Surgery, stay out of _my_ he-ad!" She laughed, singing her made up lyrics along with Christine.

"Hmm, now there is an intriguing thought…" He murmured quietly.

"I really like the actress who plays Meg, she's very believable."

"I'm sure it isn't too hard to politely treat Christine like she's a raving lunatic." He reached for the chocolate bar she had half finished and broke another piece off.

"Creepy Boquet guy, even though he's way up in the flies you still get the feeling he's trying to look down their blouses." She shuddered and watched as Erik continued to steal her candy.

"Yes, I know but don't worry he's on my to-do-in list."

"That's not exactly very reassuring."

"It wasn't really meant to be."

"The return of the Raoul! Ahhh! Run and hide!" She mock-fainted as he entered Christine's dressing room.

"I'm glad you can see the humor in this." Clearly wanting to kill the man who touched his angel, Erik clenched his jaw tightly.

"Look at it this way, out of all the gazillions of flowers crammed in that room, she likes yours the best." Mandy soothed.

"She does, doesn't she!" He lit up once again in happiness.

"Which only goes to show that though you are a very crazy man, you do have good taste in flowers."

"I would be upset but the Fop is leaving so my happiness balanced that out." He growled.

"Wow, am I lucky today or what! I should go buy a lotto ticket…"

"He's locking her in her room? And Madam Giry is just going along with it? These people are sick!" Mandy nodded in agreement before continuing.

"I want to know why the key has a huge doodad thingy on it. Does the Phantom have a problem with accidentally misplacing his key? Its like the tassel things you see on curtains!"

"Leave the poor man alone. You have no idea how hard his life has been." Mandy blinked in surprise. Clearly Phantoms are a very sensitive group. They sat and watched the movie for a bit longer till she broke the silence.

"You know, I hate this part, every time I hear it I want to track down Gerry and beat him senseless! The word is "triumph" not "tri-UMPH!"

"I see," he said, glancing over at her glowering face. "So basically your own insane psychopathic impulses are triggered by the improper stressing of a sung syllable by a man whom I notice you are apparently on a first name basis with."

"Thank you for that analysis Dr. Erik. Now that our session is over with do you mind if we continue with the movie?"

"Not at all."

"Good."

"You know," He said as the movie Phantom appeared. "I have never understood why the Phantom, who clearly is the undisputed star of the show, has to wait until now to get his first song in."

"Its because he sounds even better after everyone has had to sit through Raoul's singing." Mandy replied, though she was still somewhat upset about "Gerry's" singing.

"Good point."

"Everyone thinks that's plain old fog but come on, it's got to be marijuana or something!" She laughed at the shocked look on his face.

"Why would you think that?"

"Okay, one: a strange man appears behind the mirror and its no big deal, two: she follows him no questions asked, three: she…"

"I get the point. You think he drugged her in order to get her to his lair?" He managed to looked both innocent and knowing, with a sly expression, making her wonder if she was giving him ideas…

"What do you mean "he" did? You're "him"!" She laughed again as his stiffened in indignation.

"No I am Erik, he is "Gerry" as you call him. And besides there are other hallucinogens that would work much better with far more pleasant scents."

"I don't want to know how you know this." She teased.

"What are you implying? I know everything!" He declared as he drew himself up and puffed his chest out.

"Right…," She rolled her eyes at his theatrics. "And there you are, sans hat! I miss your hat! And just look at that, sparkly thingies on your cloak! What is wrong with these people?"

"Is that a guitar in my theme song? I don't remember a guitar playing like that. It sounds like somebody from a country band snuck in." He growled, sinking back into the comfy cushions.

"Your trademark hat is not in your first big scene and all you care about is a guitar?"

"A guitar playing moron is ruining my theme song and you care about my appearance? You do realize that there's a reason for my mask, right?" He taunted.

"So what's the reason for the moving arms on the wall?" She asked, not letting him win.

"Your guess is as good as mine."

"I think that's supposed to be Caesar." She said after a few moments of silence.

"That is not Caesar. If they're going to attempt to follow the book they could actually try reading the book." He sounded like a little boy who was pouting. It really was cute.

"The key phrase there was "supposed to be"." She argued, trying not to smile too much.

"Well sorry, but if it was your life, you'd understand! Details matter!"

"So the color of the horse is wrong, at least there's a horse even if it is totally pointless. Seriously, she never moved on stage yet she's too tired to walk down a flight of stairs?" Mandy's smile broke free as his anger erupted at her words.

"Its more that that, just look! I live by a lake! A lake! Not a glorified gargoyle-covered storm drain! In a house, a real house! With rooms and doors, not this cheesy candle-obsessed pirate's cave!"

"It is rather romantic."

"I'm going to pretend that I didn't hear that Mandy."

"How very noble of you Erik."

"I do try."

"So how come if you can get underwater candelabras to rise and light themselves you can't figure out a mechanical boat?" She asked as the duo approached the lair.

"That would totally destroy the mood!"

"Yeah right." She snickered, rolling her eyes again.

"Is it just me or is there an entire stanza of my song missing?"

"Just you."

"That's not funny." He grumbled.

"And neither are her high notes."

"Wasn't it you who warned me earlier about comments regarding her singing?" He asked as Christine continued to sing.

"Hmm, I think your right."

"I am always right." He proudly puffed up again.

"Of course you are. Anyhow, no talking through the Music of the Night."

"Why?"

"I want you to enjoy all the subtle nuances and you can't do that while talking.'

"This is going to be bad isn't it?" Looking quiet worried, he sipped at his drink.

"Now why would you think that?" She whispered, grinning wickedly.

"Because I know you, you enjoy torturing people."

"No I don't!" she giggled. "Just you…"

_**A/N**: sooo… whatcya think? This seemed a good place to stop, but fear not, I shall post the next chapter ASAP! Tell me if the dialog was hard to follow or not so I can change it if necessary. Anyhow, love it or hate it, just REVIEW it! Please?_


	2. Chapter 2

_**Author's Note**: I'm very, very sorry! I really did intend to post this sooner but I had a little accident involving a downed power line and it really is amazing how little work gets done while you're in a hospital. Plus, I've been busy with rehearsals for my very first opera performance! YAY!_

_  
Secondly, just about everyone has mentioned how confusing this story was to read, so I have tried to fix the previous chapter and this one as well. The voices in my head sound different and so I know who is saying what. Clearly you all need to get multiple voices as well in order to follow along.  _

_  
Anyhow, my heartfelt thanks to:_

_Letthedreamdescend: Thank you Anna! I love those lines too!_

_Writer4him: Second part, here you go. PS – I'm thinking this is going to have at least four parts._

_Aislin of the Shadows: Brian sharing is such a wonderful talent, is it not?_

_Dimac99: Hurrah for evilness!_

_Phantom'sSonge: More Fop ripping to come! Nice use of exclamation points!_

_Phantom'sHeart: I know, sorry for the confusion._

_DragonheartRAB: Poor Erik. evil grin_

_LiTTleLoTTe1991: I'm glad you LAHHVE it!_

_Yeun: I was going for insane but amusing works too!_

_Groundedangel: I know, hard to read, but I promise to fix it!_

_CloudxInxCrimson: Sorry about that, didn't mean to offend anyone. Banjos, gotchya!_

_Erik's angel: salutes Will do!_

_AmandaTheVampireLove: Sorry about stopping but it was twelve pages long on Word and that's a long enough chapter!_

_Erik's Dark Lullaby: Oh don't even get me started with movie animals being the WRONG gender! I have a tape of Black Beauty starring a very pregnant brood mare!_

_Shoeanders: Laughter is the best medicine unless you have broken ribs. _

_Reltistic: Thanks for the review!_

_**Disclaimer:** Beware Mandy is mine! Everyone else belongs to somebody else! _

"_That_ was The Music of the Night? Tell me again who hired this man?" Erik howled as the Phantom's final note stretched out.

"Don't look at me, I didn't do it!" Mandy protested.

"There seemed to be quite a lot of deep breathing going on in that scene," He growled angrily. "I seem to recall her welcome to my house quite differently."

"Well, he is one sexy dude." she murmured mischievously.

"I really didn't want to hear that." Erik muttered darkly.

"Even if he does have fish lips." She grinned at Erik's frown.

"Indeed." Smirking, he calmed his temper and resumed watching the movie. "And I don't want to know why he has a swan bed."

"Sneaky Meg." Mandy whispered as the tiny ballerina crept along the passageway behind the mirror. "Lets see, I don't see Christine anywhere, maybe she went down this spooky hallway behind this mirror…"

"Hmm, It isn't spooky, just dark and a little slimy."

"Rats!" Mandy announced, pointing at the rodents on the screen "See what I mean! Christine wouldn't have gone down there if it wasn't for your fog drugs!"

"Not mine, his." Erik replied calmly.

"Back to that are we?" she teased as the sneaky Meg was led away by her exasperated mother.

"You said it, not I."

"Boquet needs to wash his hair and get some mouthwash. I almost feel gross just looking at him." She shuddered as the leering creep in question grabbed a ballet girl.

"Agreed." Erik muttered, fidgeting anxiously at Madam Giry's singularly unsuccessful strangulation attempt.

"Hey there's the Monkey! Yay!" Mandy grinned at the scene change as Erik frowned again. "What a great way to wake up!"

"You are very strange." He grumbled even as his eyes were glued to the image of a waking Christine.

"By the way, I like the little toy horse you've got stashed down there, but of course the monkey is way cooler!" She teased, grabbing more popcorn.

"I still can't believe the Fop bought it! He doesn't deserve it!" though snarling, Erik refused to drop his gaze for the screen.

"We'll according to you he didn't deserve Christine either so I'm suspecting a slight bias here." She gave him a pointed look.

Erik snorted. "That's probably the biggest understatement I've ever heard considering the wonderfully slow and painful death I've got planned for him if he ever shows up again." He grinned most evilly at the no doubt marvelous plan in his head.

"Where, in the movie or in real life?" She asked, quite used to the constant terrible deaths he predicted for the Fop.

"I leave such distinctions up to you." He replied smugly as he also helped himself to the popcorn.

"You're weird." She replied, debating whether or not to start collecting a secret stash of popcorn when he wasn't looking. For a man who rarely ate he sure knew how to pack popcorn away.

"Wait a second, wasn't she wearing stockings when he put her to bed?" Erik asked sounding quite confused.

"Well, now we know where your mind has been…" Mandy rolled her eyes and giggled.

"But she had them on when she was on the horse and in the boat!" he defended himself angrily, blushing furiously.

"Well obviously the Phantom only lured her down there so that he could steal her socks!" she announced gravely.

"You need help." He announced just as gravely.

"Or an Opera House, whatever is cheaper." she agreed laughingly.

"They're more work than you'd think." He cautioned.

"I tell my agent to keep that in mind." She agreed most solemnly.

"That implies that your agent has a mind." Erik's mouth twitched as he tried not to grin. Mandy stuck her tongue out at him and pointed at the screen.

"So why did they put masks on the statues?" she asked in disbelief. "Is he really that insecure?"

"I just don't understand why he let her touch his face like that. Of course she is going to unmask him!" Erik growled angrily, watching as Christine unmasked her Phantom, before grabbing more popcorn.

"Maybe he though she was going to compliment him on his tan?" She muttered, watching in bemusement as the popcorn disappeared.

"What did he just say?" Erik blinked in confusion again as the man onscreen ranted.

"Where did the light from behind the portcullis suddenly come from?" Mandy asked, totally ignoring him.

"Now who's being picky?" He taunted though still upset.

"This is sad. She is crying but her expression still hasn't changed." Mandy commented as Christine returned the mask and the Phantom stood up. "Never mind lets focus instead on those longs legs of his!" 

Erik didn't reply for quite some time but viciously attacked the popcorn.

"Is it over?" he asked after the scene had progressed to the next. "Why is the old fop back? I have already seen more than enough of him for one movie."

"It's a flash forward." Mandy said grabbing at the last bits of popcorn left.

"Why is the movie flash forwarding?" He asked, holding the bowl away from her.

"You'll see at the end." She growled still reaching for the bowl.

"And how soon will that be?" he taunted, pulling the bowl farther away.

"Well, its after we zoom into his eyeball." At his stunned look, she pointed to the screen just in time for Raoul's eyeball's close-up.

"That is disturbing." He blanched and gave the bowl to her.

"I hope Firman wiped his boots off before strolling in there while they are trying to clean the floors." Mandy muttered, crunching on the last bits. "Or they may be mystified why it takes so long to get the darn place clean as well!"

"They changed the lyrics again!" Erik snarled. "Do they have to change everything!"

"So why doesn't Raoul's note come signed OG?" She asked, watching him seethe. "Or maybe it was but he couldn't figure out what that meant."

"That would be my guess." Erik laughed and pointedly looked at the now empty bowl. Sighing, Mandy got up to fix another bag just as Carlotta reappeared. "Why did she have to return? Nothing that resembles cotton candy that much should be that foul."

"I have an note, and you have a note, and she has a note, and he has a note, and they have a note… but no one seems to have a clue." She called from the kitchen.

"I knew 'OG' wasn't threatening enough." He muttered back, as the Phantom's voice over began.

"That man has too much free time, building little replicas of the stage and cast. With detachable heads no less! Write another opera or something!" She sighed in exasperation as the Phantom played with his little toys.

"Yes that is a rather interesting addition." He smiled in amusement and wondered if Mandy would let him bake clay figures in her oven.

"Oooo! I want a wax seal skull thingy too!" She giggled in delight.

"You don't even write letters." He stated while pondering where he could get one to bribe her with.

"I would if I had one of those thingies!" She grinned at the thought even as the scene retuned to Carlotta and crew. Erik groaned as she began singing again.

"In mercy's name can't we just fast forward through this?" He begged.

"Eat popcorn and watch the movie," Mandy ordered as she handed the re-refilled bowl back to him.

"Do I get any chocolate?" he asked attempting a puppy dog expression he had seen do wonders for the Fop.

"Fine." Mandy went back to the kitchen to retrieve it for him while trying not to laugh at how stupid he looked.

"Thank you," he grinned as she returned with his candy having successfully ignored half of the song and gotten chocolate to boot.

"Note to all Prima Donnas, if you don't get what you want, sing louder and everyone will follow you." Mandy announced, quickly eating popcorn while Erik was distracted with his chocolate. "My goodness! They are bringing in more flowers! I hope everyone took their allergy medicine this morning!"

"Why are they giving her stuff? Incompetent fools!" Erik snarled as the two men offered the diva everything but a shove through the door out.

"Well, seeing as how they are achieving their goal of keeping her they don't seem to be that incompetent, just misguided." Mandy argued playfully.

"Too bad that wig doesn't weigh a bit more or we could have ended the movie much quicker." Erik smirked.

She giggled in spite of herself at the mental image that provoked. "I don't think Sir Andrew Lloyd Webber would agree to that drastic a change to the plot but if you could convince Schumacher then clearly anything is possible."

"Schumacher?" He asked in confusion.

"The man who due to his obsession with sexy young casts changed everything, also known as the director."

"I see." With that he quickly pulled a notepad out of his pocket and began scribbling furiously.

"What are you doing?" she asked in confusion.

"If I don't tell you then you cannot testify against me later." He announced, quickly pocketing the notepad.

"Oh, okay…" Mandy sighed in relief as the scene progression provided a distraction. "Anyhow, now that that monstrosity is completed, now comes the good part!"

"The ending?" Erik asked hopefully.

"Well no, but its the next best thing. This is one of three scenes in the whole movie where Gerry morphs into Erik!" Mandy exclaimed delightedly.

"What?"

"Watch and see!" She giggled as Il' Muto began.

"Ahh yes, yet another example of this movie's blatant use of foreshadowing." Erik muttered moodily as the Phantom replaced the diva's vial with a duplicate. "I wonder what that could possibly do."

"I thought you knew everything?"

"I do, I was being sarcastic."

"All fear the great and powerful voice!" Mandy announced dramatically as the Phantom asked rhetorical questions while hiding behind the chandelier.

"If only it were that simple." Erik sighed as Carlotta croaked. "And I have never heard a sicker sounding toad in all my life.

"Could you just laugh maniacally for me? I was really looking forward to that part."

"If you wish. Hahahahaha! Hahahahaha! Hahahahhahahahaha!"

"This is why you're the best!"

"I know."

She rolled her eyes at his lack of modesty, before smiling happily as the ballet was presented. "This is it! You go Erik!"

Erik smiled as well as he watched the deadly game of cat and mouse. "If I didn't know you better I'd be disturbed by your apparent enjoyment of watching murder."

"See what a bad influence you are."

"Look at the bright side, you can now scare people with your twisted mind as well as your bad temper." He teased having been the recipient of her anger before.

"Like you're one to talk." Mandy snickered at the managers' poor handling of the situation. "Sure that's right, he only accidentally hung himself. It happens all the time."

"Well, actually…" Erik murmured before wisely shutting his mouth.

"I wish I could run in fear for my sanity and the life of someone not really worth it, up several flights of stairs while singing and not be out of breath, or falter even once." She replied ignoring his little slip up.

"Its called practice." Erik announced arrogantly.

Mandy rolled her eyes and threw popcorn at him. "Well at least I wouldn't count on the fop to save me. But then I also wouldn't try to hide on a rooftop."

"That is called logic." He smirked as he brushed off the popcorn bits.

"Snow, snow, snow! Everyone loves snow!" She exclaimed happily as the duet began.

"Except when you're standing around in it on the roof of an opera house for what seems like hours with nothing but a flimsy cloak to keep you warm while the woman you love more than life itself all but declares you a bloodthirsty monster, kisses your worst enemy, who also happens to be the number one idiot on the face of the earth and then professes her undying love for him!" Erik snarled moodily.

"Ummm… I like snow! Snow, snow, snow!" Refusing to be dragged down in his despair alongside him, Mandy continued to giggle happily.

"Someone help me." He whispered quietly fighting not to cry as Christine betrayed him once again.

"There's no hope for you, your problem is incurable." Mandy smiled sympathetically as she passed him a tissue. Looking at it in confusion for a moment, just long enough for the two lovers to kiss Mandy noted, he quickly dabbed it at the corners of his eyes.

"But not immortal," he whispered fiendishly.

"Hey! You can't kill me, I gave you popcorn!" She pouted in mock offense. "And chocolate!"

"I suppose you are right," he sighed dramatically. "And with my luck you come back as a ghost and bother me all the time instead of just occasionally."

"Wow, I feel the love. Reminds of the movie." Pointing at the screen as Christine and Raoul departed their not-so-effective hiding place.

"Doesn't she realize how expensive those things are!" Erik grumbled as the Phantom picked up the abandoned rose.

"Well if they're that expensive it was rather dumb to crush it to bits then, wasn't it!" Mandy grumbled back. "If she left it behind and he didn't want it why couldn't I have it?"

"Because that would ruin the whole symbolic meaning behind the rose in the first place." Erik hissed.

"Yeah, nothing says I still love you like pointless rose destruction." She replied sarcastically.

"That is what chandeliers are for." Erik smirked as the Phantom climbed atop the statue and dramatic music blared out of the speakers.

"Not in this version." Mandy growled in frustration as the screen went black. "Erik, be sure to underline Schumacher in that little book of yours, would you?"

_**AN:** Okay, there you go. Again sorry about the delay, I sincerely promise to try and have the next chapter up soon. Thanks again for reading and don't forget to REVIIEW!_


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